Where am I going? Where have I truly been? I don’t know nor do I fully expect to. I want to fully know, but the harder I try the less confident I become. I am a writer, photographer, mentor, and artist. It’s out there in the universe, I’m trying but I could try even harder.
I haven’t brushed the lips of success yet. I do get discouraged but I keep going. I understand that if I stop then I might as well be a empty shell working a dead end job and never leaving to explore the world.
It’s hurt but that’s life. Traveling down the only road that I’ve ever known..
Walked four miles, played tennis, and ate some really good food today. Was able to treat a friend to a meal and got some nice frozen Greek yogurt. It was a nice change of pace from simply resting. However, today I will be having a rest day so my body can recover from work and tennis.
Got some good shots as well. Will be editing later today. Did some food and street photography. I normally don’t do food photography but decided to snap a few shots. Every shot is a learning process. I’m doing my best to learn as efficiency as I possibly can. Besides that, working hard at improving myself and my life.
As I walking to my college I peered down at something shining under the blazing sun. It was a pink iPhone badly bent and the first thing that came to my mind was “someone upgraded”. In this field, I always see discarded materials like bras, phones, food, mattresses, etc. It would be a beautiful place if this field was cleaned up.
I think a lot of people are lazy and unkind. I was walking into a Walmart and saw a woman throw some trash on the ground while she was inches away from a trash can. As someone who works in retail, I see a lot of disgusting behaviors. People will drink soda then leave it behind something or chew seeds and spit them on the ground. They may just be kind people outside of this, but these kind of behaviors are a clear indicator of a personality flaw.
This is the only planet we can live on for now and we trash it. I do my part to recycle and pick up litter. It amazes me at how many don’t do this.
Kindness and Work
Do not be nice as there is always a hidden motive. Kindness comes from within and doesnt stray like being nice. I have to smile at work and help people. I am required to do it, but at some point it became genuine.
Besides that, I was able to do more today after work than normal, however, I’m still struggling with adapting to my sleep schedule. I have to be in bed at 8 and asleep by 9:30 to get up at 3am. I only slept 2 hours which made work that much harder. It’s eight now and I’m finishing up what I need to do. Hopefully, I can knock out soon so I can be a better me tomorrow.
This photo can represent someone’s desperation after their dream shatters or someone’s resolve to get rid of their vices. I love photos that may have conflicting meanings depending on who views it. I won’t state my opinion further and allow you to decide what you believe.
I’m working hard to accomplish my dreams when I actually get down and do some work. I struggle to get to the keyboard but when I’m there I write away. I’m ridding myself of distractions and focusing on my passions.
Was able to write one thousand words in less than an hour in one sitting. Im writing about something that I love and I require myself to write that much on a daily basis. I fail everyday but I’m pushing myself to try. I have the dreams but I need the hard work. I’m developing it and will continue to develop it until it’s no longer a thought.
I don’t want to be 50 years old working at Walmart for terrible pay. I want to accomplish my dreams so I must work hard. I realize this but I do get lazy. However, as each day goes by I’m less lazy. Tomorrow will be the start of a new work ethic. I have something to prove to myself and I know I can do it. I just have to do it.
I’m off to do just that. Peace,
Trying to admit my faults to become the adult that I need to be. To admit them is to grow and that’s what I need right now. I was exploring my neighborhood and found this pacifier on the ground. I tried to make the shot interesting as I took multiple shots from different angles. I like the little spiral of the strap leading to the pacifier.
I’m in the process of developing a plan so that I can make more progress in my life and so I know what to do almost every moment of the day. Been thinking deeply about my faults and ways to better my bad habits. It’s a slow process but I’m in this for the long ride. I know what I want to do but now I have to wait to make the moves necessary for me to rise to the levels that I know I was meant to be on.
My first mini-goal is to upgrade to a DSLR. I should be able to afford one in the upcoming weeks. Second, I will continue to write for a anime/manga based website before applying for a paid position. Third, will quit my current job once I find one better suited for me. That’s all I got for now but will be fine tuning it tomorrow. Not everything will be solved but I know where I need to be.
Caught this little sign while I was on a walk. I don’t know where it is from nor what it is for. I am guessing that it comes from the hardware store across the street from this tree. Anyone, it was something out of place so I caught it before it disappeared.
Today, I started working from 4 am until 1pm. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be, but this job is not for me. I won’t quit until I have another job to take its place. I’ve been working there for four days and I already want to say goodbye to this job. I have met some wonderful people, but I won’t allow that to cloud my judgement when the time comes. After I finish this post, I’m going to be updating my resume and apply to some more jobs in a career field that fits me better.
With this job, I will have to sacrifice some more things and to work even harder to improve my passions. I hope to be able to get an official job in a creative field this year. Going back to the basics to me is that I need to focus on improving my passions, focusing on my health, get money, and do the things that I need to do like get a license and be fully independent financially.
It means that I must take the first step in each category as I go back to learn the basics so I can master them.
Be great and live the life that you always dreamed about,
Making a drastic change that will be difficult, but truly worth it. I’m working a new job that will give me the capital to do my passions. Thus the pacifier photo, it symbolizes a new stage in life. I’m going to be able to be put all the plans that I have into action by doing sonething so simple.
I’m saving up to upgrade to a Nikon D3300, which is a basic entry-level DSLR. It will really help and I get public transport for free, so I will be exploring different areas of my city.
I’m doing my best to leave behind the legacy that I want when I close my book and someone else puts it to rest on a shelf that no one can reach until their time.
Baby steps to giant strides,
As I was on my daily walk, I came across some random graffiti most likely from people who worked on the street. I don’t know if they did this on purpose, but this graffiti looks like a happy face to me. Not the best shot but the best shot I could have taken at the time. The message of the shot is to simple smile and find the good things in life to ebjoy.
Got to get out of your own head and open your eyes to the experience of life. I’m adding more responsibility to my plate and somehow I feel more mature. I’m sticking to a schedule as I’ll be busy for the next two days. I am going to be the cameraman/cinematographer for a short film Friday and I have a long walk to go through tomorrow. Then cram to get the required readings for a class before the deadline at 9am on Friday. I can’t say it will be busy but somehow I am enjoying responsibility and actually getting outside more.
Since I’ve been walking 3 miles a day, I feel healthier and happier. I do exercise regularly outside of walking. Its important to exercise for many factors and it’s important to eat right. I’m not always doing the latter so I don’t lose the fat that I want to easier. I’m trying and soon I can finally ture live my words I’m trying my best.
Have fun and live how you like,
Found myself lost as I was looking for a specific building. I caught this shot which proaprob shows that I wasn’t all too concerned about finding what I needed to. In the end, I was able to do what I had to do.
I love all the lines present in the shot as well as the shadows. I wish I captured this shot earlier, so that the light would be softer. I still enjoy the shot but I have room for improvement.
In two days, I walked around 9 miles. The more I condition my body the easier and faster it is to walk 4 miles + on one day. It makes each walk feel shorter than it is as well. I’ve been practicing visualization on each trip which helps me focus on where I want to go in life.
I’m waiting for my acceptance email to officially join a project. Doubt creeps in but I’m doing my best to change the way I talk to myself. It’s not easy but it must be done. I have found myself creating more and simply enjoying life more. I realized it’s a slow process after trying to quit so many times. Doing my best to become the strongest version of myself by getting into shape, both mentally and physically. It’s getting funnier just not easier. This is the path that I chose but one foot is still on the path of ruin that I allowed myself to walk through. Will take time for me to fully step off the path but I can feel my foot inching up a bit each day that I improve myself and do what I love.