Took this a few months ago at the Japanese Tea Garden located in San Francisco, California. I was experimenting with these new lenses and color correction filters. I still have a lot more work to do to bring my photography to where I want it to be. I am simply starting small in result I do struggle but I am enjoying this struggle.
This is the second time that I’ve seen this man this year. On my first trip to San Francisco with my friends and the second time with one of the same friends. He’s dedicated to his craft and I still remember his smile from the first time we met when he held up his instrument and said “You can take a picture with your camera”. I didn’t take his offer last time but on the second trip I did. Surely, I’m 100% sure he didn’t remember me but I remembered him.
Dedication -A little essay
It sure is hard to work on your passions, but boy is it harder to work a job you absolutely hate while half-assing your passions. I currently work a dead end job in retail that I hate. I am able to hype myself up for work but when I start to work at this job I loathe every moment of it. The only time I truly enjoy is when I am able to conversate with my three friends that work there. I work hard and simply wish for the time to go by. The loss of precious seconds of my life working at that store hurts me more than anything currently in my life.
I see a co-worker/friend who has worked at this company for six years and was the person who trained me when I was first employed a year ago. This co-worker has a lovely family and is a truly hard-worker but he’s struggling mentally. He has the same hobbies as me so at times I seer him as the person I’ll become if I stay at this company. My other friend is a department manager and has been at the company for four years. We recently became friends and she’s shared with me that she likes the money she is making but wants to make an impact on people as she feels like this is not the place to be.
I can continue to list out other things that I’ve heard from other people but I think you get the gist of it. I love the fact that I have money in the bank and I can be independent, however, I don’t love this lifestyle. I work an early shift so by the time I get home I am tried. I take a nap that may last 30 minutes or 3 hours. I binge watch anime, movies, or YouTube videos. I lose myself so frequently in these acts that I forget that I am truly alive. Even today on my off day, I walked a few miles outside then watched YouTube and had a few naps.
This laziness will be the death of me. I can’t lie and say I wasn’t this way before this job. AS I was a NEET for two years. Thus I haven’t truly experienced a whole lot in my life. I have passions but I don’t always pursue them everyday, however, when I decide to sit down and write I have to pull myself from the task or when I take photos I have to stop myself from drowning in the passion. So I do know what I love and what I don’t. The only problem is my lack of dedication. I’ve been a serial cheater, so absorbed into other peoples lives that I put my passions on the shelves and watch them collect dust then complain about how they get dusty so quick.
I have everything I need in my room. I have Japanese language learning books so I can finally master the language, I have a tripod and a Nikon D3300 so I can snap away, I have a gaming laptop I bought to edit photos and to write, I have 6 notebooks in order for me to write, I have internet access, food, and a roof over my head. I have to get it through my thick skull that If I hate something so much I have to do something about it and I have to simply decide. I have to decide what is most important to me and not worry about the how. Stop planning and just focus on doing the act that I declare my ikigai.
I can’t say that I won’t mess up and that I won’t quit. But I have to do this. In order for me to pursue happiness and to truly live the life that I want.
While I was waiting for my friends, I happened to choose this church as our meet up spot. I took several shots in my attempt to capture the whole building. This was the result of my best effort. I see now that I can go back and edit the photo to be lighter, however, I like how gritty the building looks. So I can honestly say that I am satisfied with this shot.
Going back to San Francisco on Friday and can’t wait to explore the city again with my camera. I will be doing a lot of walking but will probably stay in two general areas of the city. Been using a high incline on a treadmill every other day in order to better prepare myself for the streets of San Francisco as last time I went it was a bit of a struggle. I find it much easier to pack for the trip this time around.
I will be updating this post on Friday, I’ll probably be in my hotel room when I do so. Hopefully, I would have taken a lot of photos by then. Anyway, enjoy your life.
Not my best shot but it is one that I enjoy. I hope to be able to get better as an editor as it is a huge part of being a photographer. There is a lot for me to learn and I will continue to do so. I won’t rush and get disappointed if I don’t see instant results. Patience and communication is key. I will be going back to San Francisco this week so hopefully I can have another shot at this building and others like it.
Doing my best to change and to sacrifice everything that I don’t really need so I truly pursue happiness. Slowly but surely I will see results. I simply have to keep my head up and smart small while keeping my purpose in my heart.
Keeping it short and hopefully it will become a habit again.
A shot I took as I walked to Chinatown in San Francisco. I really like the architecture of the city and I hope I will be able to capture some more shots the next time I go. I would have made the shot more symmetrical, however, I like the imperfection of this shot. There’s almost a dark feeling being presented with the flag waving slightly above the middle of the shot is a nice touch. The word “beautiful” comes to mind when I see this shot. I realize I truly love this.
Been thinking a lot but I still have some more to do. The most important part is to actually act on the results of my deep thinking sessions. There are going to be a lot of changes coming to my life and in result myself.
Another quick portrait of my friend as he drives us to San Francisco. I couldn’t imagine that I would have two good friends and those two friends would become friends as well. I also can’t believe that I would actually go on a trip with other people. I can honestly say going to San Francisco was one of the best experiences of my life. I hope that I am able to go back with these guys. Someday I’ll go back on my own and explore but I would truly be grateful if the two of them would still be my friends in the future.
Enjoy true friendship,
P.S. not my best portrait but I’m practicing and doing my best to improve.
Took this shot of my friend while we were arriving in San Francisco. I really enjoyed it as I know he’s one depressed mofo and that moments where all three friends can hang out are moments where he doesn’t have to be in that mindset. So I would title this photo as “beautiful escape”.
I don’t take many photos of people but I am doing my best to change that. Focusing on portraits in order to further my skills. Hopefully, I can continue to express myself and others through my shots.