Dedication

Portrait photography

This is the second time that I’ve seen this man this year. On my first trip to San Francisco with my friends and the second time with one of the same friends. He’s dedicated to his craft and I still remember his smile from the first time we met when he held up his instrument and said “You can take a picture with your camera”. I didn’t take his offer last time but on the second trip I did. Surely, I’m 100% sure he didn’t remember me but I remembered him.

Dedication -A little essay

It sure is hard to work on your passions, but boy is it harder to work a job you absolutely hate while half-assing your passions. I currently work a dead end job in retail that I hate. I am able to hype myself up for work but when I start to work at this job I loathe every moment of it. The only time I truly enjoy is when I am able to conversate with my three friends that work there. I work hard and simply wish for the time to go by. The loss of precious seconds of my life working at that store hurts me more than anything currently in my life.

I see a co-worker/friend who has worked at this company for six years and was the person who trained me when I was first employed a year ago. This co-worker has a lovely family and is a truly hard-worker but he’s struggling mentally. He has the same hobbies as me so at times I seer him as the person I’ll become if I stay at this company. My other friend is a department manager and has been at the company for four years. We recently became friends and she’s shared with me that she likes the money she is making but wants to make an impact on people as she feels like this is not the place to be.

I can continue to list out other things that I’ve heard from other people but I think you get the gist of it. I love the fact that I have money in the bank and I can be independent, however, I don’t love this lifestyle. I work an early shift so by the time I get home I am tried. I take a nap that may last 30 minutes or 3 hours. I binge watch anime, movies, or YouTube videos. I lose myself so frequently in these acts that I forget that I am truly alive. Even today on my off day, I walked a few miles outside then watched YouTube and had a few naps.

This laziness will be the death of me. I can’t lie and say I wasn’t this way before this job. AS I was a NEET for two years. Thus I haven’t truly experienced a whole lot in my life. I have passions but I don’t always pursue them everyday, however, when I decide to sit down and write I have to pull myself from the task or when I take photos I have to stop myself from drowning in the passion. So I do know what I love and what I don’t. The only problem is my lack of dedication. I’ve been a serial cheater, so absorbed into other peoples lives that I put my passions on the shelves and watch them collect dust then complain about how they get dusty so quick.

I have everything I need in my room. I have Japanese language learning books so I can finally master the language, I have a tripod and a Nikon D3300 so I can snap away, I have a gaming laptop I bought to edit photos and to write, I have 6 notebooks in order for me to write, I have internet access, food, and a roof over my head. I have to get it through my thick skull that If I hate something so much I have to do something about it and I have to simply decide. I have to decide what is most important to me and not worry about the how. Stop planning and just focus on doing the act that I declare my ikigai.

I can’t say that I won’t mess up and that I won’t quit. But I have to do this. In order for me to pursue happiness and to truly live the life that I want.

Simple Beauty & Purpose

black and white photography, nature photography, street photography

I enjoy capturing the simple beauty of life through roses. Their beauty doesn’t last long but it ages well until the day it dies. It doesn’t fight the natural law of living. This shot as reflects my love for playing with shadows and the film noir genre of films. One day we will all die and that is a fact of life. I will not fight death but I will fight life to live long enough to get my fill. It scares me but it is something that I’ve come to terms with.

I hope to someday be able to capture models using this method of heavy shadows. I find women from back in the 40s and 50s to be highly more attractive. Anyway, this will be a goal that I will accomplish soon. Hopefully I’ll be able to do it before this year is up.

Purpose

I am here to tell stories/create, compete, dominate, and to travel. This is my self designed purpose that calls me into the put of fire called motivation, dedication, and discipline. It’s taken me a while to come to terms with who I truly am and what I actually want to do with my life.

Through this job I currently have I’ve been able to buy the things that I need. In a few weeks I’ll be able to buy a DSLR which I will use to improve my photography and my art. I did not pick an easy path but knowing me that’s the perfect way. This job had taught me a lot and I’m more motivated than ever to get out there in the world. I just have to take it step by step and someday I will realize that I am now running free on the path that I made for me.

Be honest,

David

D87 – Journey of Goals

black and white photography, nature photography, street photography

IMG_20180314_104319-01┬áIt had been raining hard all week and I was able to capture this shot on a cloudy day. I’m getting more interested in capturing the things that normal people always ignore. Worms are apart of that as we try not to step on them but we do nothing for them. It’s not my best shot but I am growing as a photographer and as a man.

Did not go for a walk as I focused on stretching my legs and back. Explored mise en scene and composition which were quite interesting. I am interested in filmmaking, I’ve been apart of two short film productions including one I directed. I am fascinated by shots in films, I tend to judge a film by the shots. Good shots make or break a film for me. I mainly watch dark films and psychological ones so cinematography is important.

I’ve decided to focus on composition and improving my prowess in drawing, photography, and film. I’m pursuing a career in storytelling with the hopes of one-day having the skills to go strictly freelance and/or own my own media production business. It’s simple but hard yet like the work I’m simply trying to enjoy the journey to the destination as I don’t know which way I’ll end up when I reach my final destination. Just going to pick a direction and move towards it.

Keep on keepin on,

David

 

D82 – Shadows

architecture photography, black and white photography, street photography

DSC00251-01.jpegExploring Shadows while on a long walk. I enjoyed taking this photo a lot as I was able to capture all the shadows and showcase a slower pace of life with only one car in the frame with no blur. It’s a simple shot but it represents a slower pace of life.

Was able to go beyond my normal capacity today. I believe I was able to reach 70% but I will have to see after this post. I was able to get a lot of done and started my day off right with meditation and instrumental music. I did slip up a bit but I was able to pici myself up. Working hard to continue to improve and enjoy life. I’m close to discovering the simple solution to each problem I have.

I can honestly say that I was happy today. I’m showing progress but I instead that I have a lot more to do. I need to get a move on and get out into the world before it is too late.

Date to experiment,

David

D53 – Center: Moving Line

architecture photography, black and white photography, street photography

IMG_20180218_104055.jpgExploring paths and playing with shadows. Went out a little later than normal so no one was around at this time. I captured this subject from various angles. I was working with lines as well and I accomplished what I was seeking to do.

I discovered my love of moving or rather I realized my love for moving. I didn’t realize this as I can’t run at the moment and I have a lot of things on my plate that force me to not be in the best mindset all the time. That’s changing but that’s due to my progress on my journey to the strongest version of myself.

I’m still exploring who I am but I am getting a better grasp every single day when I do a new activity, an old one with a new mentality and when I have time to truly think.

Explore the depths,

David

 

Day 44

architecture photography, black and white photography, Industrial photography, street photography

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Just going out there and seeing what I can do. I took this photo a while ago but recently edited it. The focus is yellow and the grittiness of the light rail. It’s a simple shot that I enjoy. I am aiming to simply create things I want to do, even if no one checks the photos out or this blog. Every piece of art is a hit or miss, instead of feeling down I use this as a little gas for motivating myself to go further and create even more.

Just going to keep it simple today with the little insight of my life. I’m exploring my options and problems to come up with the right decisions for me. I’m planning with my mind on many steps ahead so I never lose sight of where I truly want to be. So basically, I’m investing in the long term even if I have to struggle now. That’s it for now, back to editing.

Always speak from your heart without guilt or shame,

David

Day 39 – Simple

architecture photography, black and white photography, street photography

IMG_20180203_122007

Exploring simple editing while trying not to make the photos I take dull. This is a building I have taken a lot of photos of but I have never been satisfied until I took this photo. I love how much control I have in Lightroom over a simple app but it makes me want to improve my editing skills as my free trial of Lightroom will end soon. I will edit a lot more photos and will continue to take a lot more photos while understanding why I am taking each photo.

Working hard to learn new skills and develop old ones. I’m discovering so much about myself and I have decided on a few things but I will write about my decisions later on when I put them into action.

Sometimes the best bet is to keep it simple,

David