In the Shadows

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Understanding that I must take ownership for my life and all the things I’ve done is something that truly has hit me since I started working this new job. I am cutting things out that I don’t need since I just don’t have any time as I am working four am to one pm shifts for four days a week. I only have about eight hours every day when I come home after work to do what I need to. I am still adjusting to the job so I often take a two-hour nap.

I really don’t want this job but I’m keeping it up until I am able to find a new job. Hopefully, it will be in a career field that I actually want to work in. For now, I am doing my best to do what I need to at work to make money and raise capital for the things that I truly want to do. It’s not easy but no one said that it would be. I am at fault and I accept that. However, I will not simply lay on back and accept life. I will raise to do the things that I want to do before I open my eyes and I’ve spent my whole life working this job.

My goal is to be able to take my photography and my writing and turn them into a full-time career. I’m starting by writing for an anime-based website for free and will be hosting my own anime/manga blog very soon while still maintaining this blog. I will probably buy a domain name for this site and make it truly mine. I have to do some more research but I will make a decision by tomorrow.

I am in the shadows now but with small acts of confidence, I will shine. As I love this!

Do what you love and want you can truly be great it,
David

121 Long Walk

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Captured this little guy while on a journey of my own. I don’t take a lot of shots of living creatures besides humans. I saw this snail moving in the street towards something. I will never know where it was going but it doesn’t matter.

I’m exploring new subjects everyday and seeing how I can capture them in an interesting way. It doesn’t always work out but sometimes it does. If I had a chance I would try to alter this shot move but tilting it or cutting out the blurred elements. However, I do like the part of the photo that’s blurred as it adds a human element to the shot that some of photos lack.

Still trying to figure things out, I’m doing my best to believe in the process.

Enjoy life and do what you must to do what you love,

David

109 – Spur

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No matter how much darkness tries to corrupt your path, you must keep on moving. I took this shot at my college during a busy time. I liked the shape of the shadows so I crouched down to take a few shots when people started to get into the shot. I simply used patience to create the shot that I wanted. It is a favorite shot of mine but I can see how I can make it better. Would have stepped back a bit so the light wouldn’t be as badly reflected through the glass on the right. I do like how you can only see one of the subject’s hands. It has disappeared inside the darkness thanks to her backpack.

Watching the NBA finals, disappointed that the Spurs can’t win a single game against the Warriors. I know they can do it but they defeat themselves. I have the same problem in my own life but I’m learning faster than they are. I took a step in a positive direction today, however, I need to step a bit faster. I was filled with energy and made more positive decisions than bad ones. That’s it for now but I hope you all have a great day.

Peace,

David

Day 91 – Going My Own Way

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Exploring the world and myself at the same time. Rather than simply following a solid plan, I keep my options open. I am willing to experiment like in this shot. I purposely included in my shot for multiple reasons. Once a upon a time I once said to a woman that I felt like the shadow. I can’t really explain it now but I will leave you with that I felt dark when I was younger. I’m completing a photography program in which the final step is to include yourself in your photography.

I force myself to fight laziness to push myself further. I always listen to my body if I ever feel sharp pain and I pay attention to what things actually keep my attention. I’m doing all this by trial and error. Less entertainment, more moving and doing. Thinking critically about everything and simply living the way that I want to. It is a journey that I must complete before I am able to go on another one.

Just start,

David

D81 – Up

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Exploring reality with philosophy and photography. Took this shot while I was preparing to leave the local library. It’s a place that I come to when I want to do some work without my back hurting from a bad chair and to get away from my four walls. I like this library as the second floor is for adults with the bottom floor for children. It makes it quiet and a more enjoyable reading experience.

I was interested in the light and decided to take this photo as I made my way down the stairs. It’s not always like this since it’s pretty rainy lately. On this day, I explored philosophy and my own mind. When I go to the library, I get work down. I might be there for three hours and get a good amount of work done in an hour and a half. I’m still exploring my options and the library helps wonders with that. I haven’t found the simplest solution but I am working even harder on it. I’m trying to remember the Bruce Lee quote “Feel don’t think” it’s harder than you may think to put into practice.

I completed a section of a free coding camp. I wanted to think about how I feel while doing it but I focused on doing the task and told myself I will think later. I don’t know if coding is my thing as I don’t feel nothing for it and have studied it in the past. I will continue to explore and will work even harder to get to the life that I want and to be the man I know that I can be.

Stay strong and feel,
David

D70 – Feel and Suffer

Daring myself to do more self-portraits as an experiment. I have noticed an increase in my confidence in myself and my photography. I like to explore the world, I ofen allow myself to get lost. Often I don’t bring my main camera, as I often leave when it’s very bright outside. I will the nex time I go on an adventure.

I was able to move up a gear but I put myself back down another gear. I still made progress but not much as I would have liked. I see this as me going backwards to move forward. It is a saying that I discovered for myself when I used to play video games a lot in my teens. I simply have to force myself more and more while doing the best work I can. The key is that I need to suffer. I need to suffer to feel life, to suffer through my work, and suffer through my fears to move ahead in life. There have been many setbacks but I will charge on until I can’t go up anymore gears. When I die I want to be able to die happy for a cause and be carried out on a shield. Not as a symbol of saddness but as a symbol of strength, courage, and honor. I am a man and I am a warrior fighting for his cause until the day he dies.

Be a warrior and suffer,

David

D59 – Solid

IMG_20180225_125124-01.jpegGot to have a solid foundation before you out anything on top of it. I was exploring the areas around my stomping grounds and was thinking of concepts. I discovered how the shadows were hitting the cinder blocks and captured it from a different angle. I like how harsh the shadows are and the details in the blocks as they show you have you have to be tough to lay down the foundation you need. You just have to uncover what’s underneath the shadows to know where to build.

I am loving editing and photography more each time I go out and simply do those two things. I am working on my “10, 000” hours in a way. Not just with photography but with other ventures that I love while I work on my strengths and weaknesses.

Foundations,

David

D49 – Reflection

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Explored a new are today and caught this photo while on this adventure. I’m working up to walk 4 miles a day, at the moment I walk two and a half miles. I enjoyed playing with the shadows and nature as I was deeply thinking. I am focusing on not being lazy with the photographs and plan the shots out more.

Watched the NBA All-Star game and was highly disappointed in more than one way. I realized I that I must take my craft seriously every single time I pick up my camera and I must put out the best work I can every single time I upload something. Also, I need to relax and be more laid-back and enjoy life.

Things are starting to become clearer to me and my path is starting to form as I dig through life. Made some changes but I must change more things to become the best version of myself.  I will continue to work smart and to work hard, this is my promise to myself.

Live well,

David

D35 – Walk Tall and Fly Like An Eagle

Exploring reality and myself while getting out of the house. I am starting to realize some answers to questions that I have always asked myself. It’s becoming clearer to me as what to do with everything in my life. Slowly but surely I am making the necessary changes to live a better life. I know that there is a giant wave of negativity coming my way soon, however, I will not let this wave destroy me.

It’s easier said than done but I will continue to go like Eagles did against the Patriots. I’m willing to bet it all to capture every 1st down until I get into the end zone. I won’t rest until the job is done even if I have to fight every minute. I will not breakdown until all my problems are behind me.

This photo represents my journey going through life. I may be at a standstill but I am a bridge that will allow me to get to somewhere better. I enjoy this photo a lot because of the good day I was having and the overall style of the photo.

Fly like an eagle,

David

Day 33 – Snap to the Bottom

Lost in so many ways, expect for the right way. Workin hard in every aspect of my life but like the Bone Thugs N Harmony song “I Tried” I take one step forward to go three steps back. I still have something to live for, so I am not totally lost. It is going to become more and more difficult for me to breathe easily without stress. I have a lot of questions to answer and a solution to find. Hopefully, I am able to find a simple solution to everything. I feel like its staring into my face but I can’t seem to find it.

I can’t say things are the same as a few years ago. I am a much stronger person but I realized today I still have a long way to go. However, I will not sink back to who I was. Even if my personal life is suffering, I will continue to move forward as a man and become the strongest version of myself.

This photo represents my path that is currently split in half thanks to an imperfect shadow. This is the nicest representation I could find in my archive that shows how I feel without showing an extremely dark photo.

Keep your head up,

David